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Leaving the nest? Here's one time you should
Listen to Dad
By Matt Stone

March 4, 2006

For those venturing out into the real world and those who remember when they made that same journey, there is a consensus: it's not easy.
Joe Kahler hopes to ease this transition with his new book, "Out on My Own… Now What?!"

Kahler, a first-time author, put together tips and tricks for real-life situations that he hopes will get across one vital point that he feels is taught to the contrary prior to leaving school.
"In school they teach you to not make mistakes, but in real life you have to make mistakes and embrace them," Kahler said.

Kahler's book covers a wide array of subjects including: finances, cars, homes, social skills and life lessons.
While it may sound like a dull guide, it incorporates elements of humor and is written to the level of the target audience, those fresh into the nine to five world, Kahler said.

He was able to do this with the aid of his own daughters, two of whom are attending Northern Arizona University.
"They were painful critics," Kahler said. "(But) they were very instrumental."

Kahler makes use of a colorful bird named OOMO who is portrayed throughout the pages in the real-life situations.

OOMO, which stands for Out On My Own, has "OOMO moments," that is, when life lessons are learned the hard way. Often, this is the way people must learn, Kahler said.
"Going through the bumps and bruises," Kahler said. "(It) shows a lot of what I learned the hard way."

While he uses his own past to qualify him to write this life-guide, Kahler said, he also holds an undergraduate degree in social sciences from Whittier College and a masters in education from Arizona State University.

Kahler's book has been received well in many circles, winning both the Just For Mom Foundation Mom's Choice Award and the 2005 Family Choice Award.
Kahler is not sure whether he will write any more books, though he does have plans to continue his work. He hopes to put together a seminar for kids to help teach the lessons described in his book.

Kahler's intentions were originally to help his daughters to receive what he considers important information, but his scope has now broadened to helping a wide range of readers.

If nothing else, he hopes to get across the one thing that will help those in transition be successful, Kahler said.
"Don't be afraid to ask for help…to make mistakes," Kahler said.

For more information on Kahler and his book, visit

Excerpts from "Out on My Own...Now What?!"

Auto---Have a budget and stick to it. The emotional excitement of getting what you want now will be completely outweigh by the financial and emotional letdown and burden that follow.

Investing--If you start early, you have a lot of time and you will not need as much money

Manners--The first person to reach the door should be the one responsible for holding it open for others.

Interviews--Arrive about 10-15 minutes early, give a warm greeting and firm handshake and relax and be yourself.

What to do when you're pulled over by the police--One of the first things an officer may say to you is, "Do you know why I pulled you over?" Admit nothing. Be courteous and be polite. Don't try to guess why you were pulled over. Allow the officer time to explain the reason why you were stopped.

You're moving into an apartment, now what?-- Have the phone turned on, have all the utilities turned on, get some food in the fridge and make sure you have at least a towel or two and don't forget the toilet paper.

Laundry--Read the label on the garment, sort clothes by colors, make sure all pockets are empty and do not overload the washer with clothes.

In case of an emergency--Know where your gas line shut-off valve is. Have extra bottles of water on hand. Have a plan of escape in case of a fire.

Credit--One credit card is the maximum you need to own … until you understand good debt!

How do you tell someone they have bad breath?--The simplest way is to offer them a mint. The only problem is when they don't accept one! I would then ask them again with a warm smile and hopefully they will pick up on the fact you are trying to help them. If all else fails, tie them down and force the mints into their mouths. Hopefully, they get the mint … hint. You may lose a friend, but at least you can breathe easier.

Losing weight--Dieting and exercising are absolutely necessary in order to lose weight in the form of body fat.

Resume content--Describe specific responsibilities. Highlight accomplishments by using positive language to describe results, qualifying or quantifying the accomplishment wherever possible.

Tire maintenance--If you're driving a long distance and it's really hot outside, run the tires under-inflated about five pounds. The heat causes the tires to expand, and just in case there's a weak spot in one of the tires, under inflating your tires can give you a little insurance.

If you get into an accident--Stay where you are. If you're hurt, don't move until the paramedics arrive. Have your driver's license, registration and insurance card ready.

Homeowners insurance--Homeowners insurance is a must. It's one of those things you simply can't do without. In today's world full of earthquakes, tornados, floods, vandals, people driving through your living room, high winds, falling trees, mud slides, flash floods and of course, the one that frightens us most of all, the dreaded volcano eruption, there are plenty of great reasons to make sure you have adequate homeowners insurance.

Mastering money--There are four stages of mastering money: earning money, saving money, knowing how to spend the money and the ability to invest money.

Financial planning--Probably the most important step, and certainly the step you should take first, is to figure out how much you can afford to spend. If you haven't set up a budget that shows you how much you're spending on everyday things, now is that time to do it.

How do I handle rude people?--It's always best to be gracious and forgiving with those people who either don't know how they come across, or are just hurtful. One option is to reduce the time you spend with them. Another option, which I've personally used many times to good effect, is to simply say something positive and non-committal in reply.

What if you have poor service at a restaurant?--The best solution would be to speak to the manager who may just rip up the check and offer you an incentive to come back.

How to get your time back!--Don't let the telephone control your time. Pick a regular time to place and answer your calls. Learn to say NO. Be careful of procrastinating. Develop an efficient filing system. Set your priorities.

Creating teams--Check the person's interest level, check the prospect's responses, check results.

Dressing for success--Wear an appropriate outfit for the function. Make sure your clothes are clean and pressed.

Develop a journal and tell your story--Keeping a journal, a type of personal record of both your business and personal life, can make all the difference. Look at it as a record of your life, so to speak.

Instructions for life--When you lose, don't lose the lesson. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. Spend some time alone everyday. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

Plenty more tips and insights can be found in "Out on My Own… Now











































































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